Thursday, November 8, 2007

Salvage Some Pride

I don't know? Maybe you can't understand. Here we are with all the world at its knees, begging for a taste of freedom. All's we need now is the answer! I'm sure if it was crafted right, or if the right person promoted it, or if the right timing was set in place...She'll listen to you, man.

"I soared with fire and power, striking fools down at both sides. Arrogance to my left, fear to my right. I glared with discontent at aphrodite's advance, I curled my lip and raised my brow. What could she have to offer me, anyway? love? Excitement? Everything I already had. I was really just amused that she would consider me, and that was all it was. I could let her pass. I could let it all pass."

There's a hole in that beam of light, you see, I could nestle my soul within its ray and be lifted. The lightness of my conscious state, ey.

Aye, look away. There's no concern anymore, you gotta let it go, let it be. Take your weary hands off for awhile. Your hands are full of hatred, you know that. The long night has set in, your unrepentant heart gives you more appeal. Sparkle up some joy for yourself. When you recieve your award, how many thankyou's could you give...two, three at most. See, you're look'n at this all wrong. Your perception changes with its stimuli, brother. It's merely reacting to the forces. Now is that right, or wrong?
It just is.
- Buck up.

Friday, November 2, 2007

Alright, come on. We're talking about the relationship between falling, and crashing. Focusing on the space between where you fell from and where you crashed, could be seen as the consciousness that never ends. We are eternally rising and falling. Reaching new heights all the time. Therefore, chronologically we are all going upward in the pursuit of self-realization. Though some people have a debased view of self, they are still actualizing it, all the time. So, thinking this, we should be striving for goodness and freedom, or we may never attain it. And we may never attain it.
Oh, I'm reading this book called Post Secret. It is a collection of post cards sent to editor Frank Warren. People anonymously send in their deepest secrets and he publishes them into a book. here are a few:
"I started shooting heroin agin."
"I once wrote an x-rated letter to a boyfriend who broke up with me before i could give it to him. ...I gave it to my next boyfriend!"
"I will always be the weird quiet girl."
"I drool, alot."
"sometimes I wish I was better at faking it."

Well, I'm goin to Ohio for a bit. Be cool.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Church and State

We live an a society supposedly built on religious freedom. Now, freedom means liberation - both to and from. Freedom to have your own religion. Freedom from someone else's religion. So, why then was it ever legal to proselytize Christianity in our institutional civil society? And is still practised today. Hold your beliefs, that is your right and freedom, but do not infringe upon my rights by projecting your agenda on my life. Should your standards act as a bench mark to mine? This is what turns me off to Christianity. And I am a follower of Jesus. Did Jesus condemn, or even persuade people into his system of belief? It seems he lived a certain lifestyle and that lifestyle inspired others to know him closer.
In class today I was demonized infront of everyone, for a comment I made, by a right-wing, fundamentally conservative, pentacostal, proselytizing Christian Professor! And did I back down? Never. I fired back with an equally relevant caliber of ammunition. She was left with nothing to say. Because I proved to her, that in the end, the answer is unknowable. You'll have your idea, I'll have mine. This is why freedom of religion is absolutely necessary in a healthy society. If any one religion was correct, or if even the belief in a God was undeniable, it would be a different story. There would be no reason not to believe, if it was empirically true. There would, however, be a whole list of new things to question. Nonetheless, any belief in God, or disbelief in God, is a statement of "faith." Faith is purely a personal experience. Jesus alludes to this notion of faith when he heals the woman with a blood condition, after she has reached out to touch him, saying to her "your faith has made you well."
We must exhibit an abundance of tolerance, coupled with a living out of our beliefs. Oh, hell yeah.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

True-self, unknowable?

1- If you know what something looks like, can you be that thing? By emulating characteristics and attitudes does that make you a certain way, or not? For instance, say you know what it looks like to be carefree. Does that mean "you" can be carefree? By appearing to be one way with others it would be hard for them to percieve you any other way. But, maybe you are not carefree and truly at the grain of your being is fear and trepidation. Are you a liar, then? Or, are you just strong willed?! Too strong to let mear idiots start to know who you really are on the inside. Is that a dangerous mascarade of emotions that you are simply unwilling to discover or, even worse, are uncapable of understanding? Far more dangerous than a lie. *unwilling/incapable - we'll pick it up later*

1- Before I get too far into this I must address an issue of word meaning. I am using the word 'lie' to denote any aspect of yourself that ultimately denies yourself. However, this is not accurate to the general meaning of the word. By definition a lie is a false statement with the intent to decieve. The glaring problem in my argument is intent. Someone may be completely misrepresenting themselves and not necessarily be lying. I think the word partrition would be more closely related to this discussion. However, not withstanding the disclaimer, I will continue on with my more shocking and skin curdling denotation - "liar."

2- Should I let my reader in on my intent? Do I just write to fancy myself, placing some random sentence next to another, some word with a set value next to its counterweight, and all of this with little to no concern with content and my impact on an audience? Just because? To ruffle invisible feathers, being "a rebel without a clue?" Well, by believing that you would be denying me as an artist. So, if you deny me as an artist then please, by all means. But, if you have any notion of what I think or feel, in hopes to shake the ignorant stongholds of hate and insecurity. Then maybe, we could all enter into a more realized relationship to our creator.

2- excerpt: "You Couldn't See Yourself Clearly"
"You are a liar! A mother %#$*ing liar, man! I thought we had something? >> I thought you were holding the International Peace for a reason. Based on principle? But, you were in it the whole time for yourself. Servicing me with your words // all the while, satisfying your pockets with power. ++ You took advantage of poverty. You gleamed with resentment at unjust socialization and yet you are the mask of revolution? And beneath your wax and plastic is the most hidious face of all! The face of truth."

1&2- In this excerpt, truth, is the misrepresented reality. Everyone has masked themselves to some degree. A mask of humility, understanding, happiness, public service, whatever? Existence is progressive. So, what occurs in the future is directly related to what we do in the present. This makes the idea of intent even more compelling. We essentially, by relying on our intent, are saying we know the future or have some idea of the future. Have you ever noticed a limitless stream of consciousness? It appears limitless but, it is not. It may be limitless to oneself. This is why we are comfortable with believing in our system of reality. Simply because it is the only system we know. However, it is not the only system we have access to. [Incoming Danger] Everything you know and experience stems from your consciousness. Perceptions and behaviors, though largely influenced by environment, are ultimately under your jurisdiction. So can "you" change?

Unwilling/incapable
1- Can you change? Are you unwilling, or incapable? I would argue that yes you can change, most generally. And I will limit my projections to matters pertaining to the mind - thought patterns, self idealizition and perception. What if you are "incapable." Strange word. Incapable, refers to inability/limitation. Some capabilities can only be manifested through willingness. (e.g. You must be willing to swing the baseball bat, in order to be capable of hitting the ball with it) Willingness can be seen as a catalyst for change. Some would argue that if you are currently uncapable, then you are incapable. That is a fatalistic view, in nature. Not that you are a fatalist, but call it what it is. Negativity, doubt, hopelessness. And these are all highly valid. And in themselves they are neither good or bad. Hopelessness can be a reality, hopelessness can also be a mindset. (This is where the English language really sucks, because I am not familiar with any word that separates these two meanings) And I apologize if it feels like I am barreling through these ideas. Hopelessness when applied as a mindset will cause an interesting reduction. If, as I mentioned earlier, some capabilities can only be manifested through willingness. and hopelessness (as a mindset) is an opponent to willingness. Then, hopelessness decreases the possibility of capability. Therefore, having a willingness to change will make it more possible to change.
Now, I realize this sounds elementary, but it is far from it (my ignorant little prude). Because what if a persons incapability lies in the realm of willingness? Willingness, as a form of hopefulness, presents a galactic catechism. How do you bridge the gap of willingness, to being willing/having willingness. This quickly diverges, in my mind, to a spiritually dark conversation. A very interesting one, though. One which I will pick up at a later date. Thanks for the cereal Capt'n Crunch!

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Homo-America

Sometimes the right thing to do isn't always apparent. The black and white is often dolluted by a shade of grey. I think this is why life seems to change, as it does. If there was an absolute right and an absolute wrong then their would be no question of morality. We would not be caught in the midst of various issues such as same sex marriage and abortion. However, these answers are not black and white. So how do we reconcile our personal beliefs with cultural progression. We should "not" assume government policy to be the same as morality. First, we must see the government as an institional entity created by society and also inherent to society. People govern. Therefore, government is flawed. Vomit out the notion that we are some 'holy' nation. There is no such thing. That would be to say that we are a holy people, and we are not. There is none holy, only the Lord. We may pride ourselves in a heritage rich with Christianity and fundemental law, but how far have we strayed from those early principles? Furthermore, how pure were those early principles to begin with?

Let's begin with same sex marriage and surrounding issues. Should a gay couple be allowed to marry not withholding any rights to those persons ( including legal adoption)? What do you think? And why do you think that way? Let me begin by making some open-ended questions.



- Who marries people, the Church or the State?

- What does a healthy home look like?

- Does a child in a single-parent household have a good upbringing?

- Is the nuclear family structure (mom, dad, children, and probably a dog) the most beneficial?



I want to talk a little about the family, first. For two reasons: #1 Maybe looking at this issue of childrearing will shed more light on the question of legal marriage. #2 The topic of same sex marriage involves so much religious babble that I'm just not looking forward to getting into at this moment, (woke up early today, went to some brain taxing class, incredibly hungry, oh...and my hammy's are sore from jogging).

Okay, so children are the future. And it is important that children are cared for. Let's look at what it means to be cared for. Basic needs being met: food, shelter, clothing. Internal needs being met: affirmation, love, respect, peacability. Social needs being met: general socialization, basic moral principles 'modeled', healthy relationship 'modeled'.

Is a gay couple capable of financially supporting a child? Would it be possible for a gay couple to love a child and nurture him/her in an emotionally stable atmosphere? Finally, and most contraversially, would a gay couple succeed in meeting socialization skills in our modern day society? And what is socialization, is it merely following preconcieved norms? These are all questions which may be raised when discussing this issue.

What is socially acceptable? I think our answer to this question reveals the truest nature of our disposition. Really take this in, cause it'll change your life. It is socially acceptable in our popular society to 'fit in' to some box. To look good. To hate certain people, and certain things, and certain ideas. These underlying themes sometimes sound like "they," "we." This creates unfimiliarity with difference, which breeds anger and hostility and leads to hatred and acts of violence in extreme cases.

Understanding how we view society will help us see what is truly important to us. Is it more important that a child has a nurturing upbringing, or that a child has a socially acceptable upbringing? If it's the latter, then we must recognize that we're more concerned with maintaining social constructs than we are with a childs wellbeing. Our ideas of gender role and normacy outweigh our desire to see children being cared for.
What if, allowing same sex marriage and legal adoption reduced the number of mistreated and abandoned youth? How would this affect society as a whole? How would this affect your opinion?
I realize that I have raised many questions and left most of them unanswered. And I really have no idea why I chose this topic at all, I am not gay and I don't really care much about gay rights. I was in a discussion with my friend Paul and somewhere in the midst of politics, morality and Georgy Bush we hit this topic. I don't think it is very openly discussed especially among Christians. So, please feel free to respond and voice your opinion on this postmodern topic and maybe I'll return the favor by telling you what I "really" think. Go Bucks.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Fury

Winter looms in brilliant sparkle. Icy cold relentless power.

Frozen blood where bleeding pounded/chills of pain when love is sounded



Winter looms in brilliant color. Reflecting light, the sun is mirrored.

Stranger warmth beneath its snow/painted darkness fear is thrown



-- Heavy is the hearts distant lover -- mourning and repentance must find its place --

-- confounded by truth and appearance -- suspended smiles from a Holy thunder --



Winter crushes dreams of beauty. Only the reality of cold remains.

This then becomes beauty.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Spiritual Economics

Releasing love to the world is something we all have the power to do. There is no monetary cost. It is more a thing of aptitude. Understanding the principles of giving intagible gifts to others such as peace, trust, love, understanding and selfcontrol. It can be seen as the "economics" of the spirit.

For instance, investing love into someone will expand their ability to love. Being understanding towards a person releases a greater likelyhood of them being understanding of you, and to others. This is not an equilibrium of truth. As if loving someone assures that they will love you in return. However, these are fairly reliable principles. Not in that they pay you back a good deed. Infact, the the deeper you know the invisible attributes of mankind the less you will be concerned with a reward, or a karma-like reality.

You may find that releasing positive energy is less of a rewards system and more like a growing of self. Letting go of jealousies, maliceness, and fear (to name a few) strengthens those around you (yes), but ultimately it looses your inhibitions and strengthens yourself. You begin to find freedom in the all necessary task of renovating your island. Making your existence a more livable state. The goal is not peace, happiness, or self sufficiency those are merely by-products. The "goal" is becoming closer to God and his spirit and truth.

It may sound like a twist ending, involving God with this hippie mumbo-jumbo, but it is not all. God is not even the ending, rather the entirety. Whether you believe in "God" or you don't, you have atleast the idea of God. This idea of a God has been around long before you and I. It exists outside the chronology of time. And where gaps of life and faith are concerned we are unwillingly placed in the forefront. It is then our responsibility (whether acknowledged or not) to discover the truth of meaning for ourselves. A good launching place would be to use these underlining human principles such as love, trust, peace and understanding. This takes on more clarity when viewed in relationship to agricultural laws. The law of reaping and sowing, for example, is both fundamental and transcendant. It speaks to the constancies of creation. These constancies like reciprocation, process and intricacy all appear to parallel the spiritual.

Take reaping and sowing. If love represents the seed, then a multiplication of love would be its harvest. If I invest love and respect to others, that love and respect will be expanded within them and myself. If I release peace to someone it will begin to cultivate an atmosphere of peace. Same with trust, generosity, etc. And these attributes, when repeated, begin to confirm the very nature they possess. Through time as we are more aware of ourselves and who we are becoming these attributes appear more visibly. The same is true with there negative counterparts: fear, hatred, anger, suspicion. These spiritually dark attributes are just as capable of expanding and confirming. The end result is always destruction, "the breaking down of." These are debilitating traits. We can become aware of these cycles and begin to reverse them.

Infact, it is necessary for our well-being that we begin to reverse these dangerous traits. So, I pray that you would reinforce what is good and moral in our world today. We are the only catalysts for change. And if you haven't created a football fantasy team yet, I seriously suggest that you do. later.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Distance

Time is a swirling menace. Changing more rapidly as it drudges along. Yet, time is not the same for everyone. It comes and goes. It replenishes and destroys. It allows hardened hearts to be softened and causes hatred to go on forever in the hearts of many. Time reels us in like lofty merchants. We flourish in the glory of youth and possibility. We lament at the perils of the age and laugh at our inability to secure the future.

Millions die with thirsty blood. A thought of change and endurance, wiped out by careless desire. Have mercy Lord, drawing near to you. Beauty not forgotten in rage. Help those in need. Listen to your brother, cherrish your sister. Hang on to the promise. Distance is strength. Life comes rushing as a mighty wave and then subsides along the beach. Peace will fill your varied thoughts. And love will guide brokeness with gentle disregard.

Eat more hot dogs today than you did yesterday. Ball Park Franks. (if you can handle it)
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